Meatloaf Recipe For Drunks

Step One: Purchase a loaf of bread, two pounds of cheap ground beef, eggs, a large jar of cheap ass tomato sauce.

Step Two: Turn the dial on your over two thirds of the way around. Do this first. Really.

Step Three: Wash your hands.

Step Four: Throw the meat into a bowl. Crack two or three eggs into it.

Step Five: Rip up five or six slices of bread and throw them into the bowl.

Step Six: Dump two thirds of the jar of sauce into the bowl.

Step Seven: Put one shake of every spice you have in the house into the bowl. Also add three shakes of worchester sauce if you happen to have a bottle of it around.

Step Eight: Stick your hands in the bowl and mush it around until it starts becoming one solid mass. Then shape the solid mass into a loaf shaped item.

Step Nine: Open the oven door. If you have been following this closely heat should emanate from the oven. If not, remember to turn the dial on the oven two thirds of the way around and wait 10 minutes.

Step 10: Put the loaf like object onto the oven pan. Then pour the last third of the jar of sauce over the loaf like object.

Step 11: Close over door. Wait 75 minutes.

Step 12: Open over door, take out food.

Step 13: Wait 15 minutes for loaf to cool.

Step 14: Eat.


5 Responses to “Meatloaf Recipe For Drunks”

  1. Wee Clare Says:

    Ive never tasted meatloaf, or seen it. Ive never really got what the fuck it even is. After seeing your recipe im no less tempted to find out.

  2. Must the concoction be loaf shaped? May one try shaping it into another shape, perhaps one more complex like a bunny rabbit?

    • threemilechild Says:

      If you’re drunk enough, all you’re going to get is “loaf” or “penis” or maybe “boob.”

      • drunkexpatwriter Says:

        If you are that drunk you should do take out.

        This assumes drunk but capable of turning on a stove.

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