Archive for tips for drunks

Mac And Cheese Recipe For Drunks

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on May 20, 2011 by drunkexpatwriter

Step One: Purchase a box of macaroni, two bags of the shredded cheese of your choice, a garlic bulb, a small bottle of cheap white wine and some butter.

Step Two: If you are in America buy some cheap smoked ham from the deli and cut it up in small chunks. If you are in Europe purchase a package or two of lardons.

Step Three: Throw some oil in a pan. Break up the garlic bulb and throw that in the oil.

Step Four: Turn on the stove. I can’t stress this point enough.

Step Five: Throw the ham or lardons into the pan and stir.

Step Six: After the ham or lardons have cooked enough (Rome Girl likes them crispy, but you can really do this to your own personal taste) pour about 250ml of white wine over the ham/garlic concoction.

Step Seven: Turn heat to the lowest possible setting and let wine/ham/garlic simmer for like 30 minutes. Stir every so often.

Step Eight. Cook macaroni in boiling water.

Step Nine: Drain macaroni. Put half a stick of butter and one of the cheese packages into the pasta. Stir a bunch.

Step 10: Pour the wine/ham/garlic concoction (do real cooks call this “stock?”) over the macaroni and stir a lot.

Step 11. Pour the second package of cheese into the macaroni. Stir some more.

Step 12. Let entire thing sit for like 15 minutes so the cheese can become less hot and stringy.

Step 13: Eat.


Guinness Beef Stew Recipe For Drunks

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on May 20, 2011 by drunkexpatwriter


Step One: Purchase a kilo of cheap cubed beef, a package of potatoes, two 16 ounce cans of guinness, two cans of peas and a garlic bulb.

Step Two: Put some form of oil in the bottom of a pot. Break up the garlic into pieces and throw into the oil.

Step Three: Turn on the stove. This is important. I’ve forgotten this step in the past and wondered why the garlic was not cooking.

Step Four: As the garlic browns throw whatever spices you may have in your kitchen into the pot. Like a handful will do.

Step Five: Dump beef in. Stir it until it is brown on all sides.

Step Six: Dump potatoes and peas in.

Step Seven: Pour one and half of the cans of guiness over the food. Chug the remaining half can of Guinness.

Step Eight: Stir concoction until it boils. Then turn the heat way down.

Step Nine: Wait five hours. If you are listening to music, stir after every eight songs (every two if you are listening to Pink Floyd’s early albums.) If you are watching television stir after every episode.

Step 10: Eat.

Note: You can also dump some Worchestire sauce and sugar in during the five hour wait depending on your personal taste and if you remembered to buy either product.